Die Another Day

Pierce Brosnan's last Bond film was the first that I saw in the cinema. In England, all of his run of films had been rated 12 certificates on release (barring anyone from attending a screening of that rating if under 12, even if with parent or guardian [until the first Spider-man movie came out, got the 12 rating and which led to the British Board of Film Classification to scramble to come up with a 12a rating, which allowed people under 12 go if with a parent or legal guardian].

I'd just turned 12 on release of Die Another Day, and had already managed to watch a great chunk of the franchise, starting off with a couple of Roger Moore's (with nifty covers, where when each film in the series was assembled in order, spelt out "007" across their spines. The McCormack clan  all ventured to the Southport VUE cinema to see Die Another Day. We got tickets but I remember the screening being jam-packed - Bond movies were and hopefully still are in this post-COVID19 world "event" movies. 

And in the eyes of 12 year old Joe, he thought Die Another Day was pretty great. Over the top villains, a second half of non-stop action, escalating like a less nuanced video game, it ticked all of his boxes. Critics at the time were somewhat less complimentary, and ire towards this film has steadily built over time, where it is not unusual for it to be referred to as the worst in the series. 

Does Die Another Day deserve such scorn? The case for the prosecution is always the same "The literal white-washing of a South Korean villain through gene-therapy, the constant one-liners, the Madonna song, THE INVISIBLE CAR! THE ICEBERG SURFING!" And I, acting as defence agree, these are questionable design choices at best, and in the case of the villain's change of race is highly problematic. However, and this may sound like faint praise, but unlike my pick for worst film in the series - Diamonds are Forever - there is still a sense of mad invention running throughout the film, and not one of the actors are phoning it in (unlike Sir Sean in Diamonds). 

An even stronger defence is that there is a half a classic Bond hiding in the film. It starts out compellingly enough, with a pre-credits sequence seeing Bond captured in North Korea, after apparently successfully assassinating the rogue North Korean Colonel Moon. He is then tortured for information for 14 months, before being traded for a diamond encrusted terrorist, Zao. The opening set piece hews a little too close to the cinematography of Tomorrow Never Dies and its terrorist arms bazaar opening but it is nevertheless an explosive spectacle, and subverts the trend that Bond normally emerges triumphant from this pre-credit sequence. 

We then have his torture relayed to us over the credits sequence, whilst Madonna's divisive electro trash/treasure squeaks and blips. Again, invention is seen in the production of these title credits, as for the first time ever, we actually have the plot advancing in tandem with the credits sequence. Okay, I know it isn't inventing the wheel but it is 20 films in now! However, Madonna's electronic exuberance probably should be a tip-off to the more out there plot twists that would develop in the second half of the film. 

But before then we have testy exchanges between M and Bond, he disgusted that she agreed to the prisoner exchange as they had received a tip that he may have been divulging state secrets under duress. These confrontations between Bond and M are probably the greatest contribution to the series from Brosnan's tenure, down to the sharp writing between the pair, and the acting of both, but in particular Dame Judi Dench, 

As is Bond's want when he gets in trouble, he briefly goes rogue to track down Zao, who he learns may be enlisting the services of a sinister clinic in Cuba. Brosnan swaggering around Cuba, shades on and cigar in mouth, is a classic Connery-esque reconstruction (one of many subtle and not so subtle nods back to the series' history in this film as a celebration to mark this as the 20th). To match this throwback, the Cuban setting recalls earlier entries such as Dr No and Thunderball and it seems that the film is on track for a relatively grounded plot. 

However, framed as another callback, Halle Berry's Giacinta "Jinx" Johnson, emerges from the ocean in homage to Ursula Andress' iconic introduction in Dr No, and with her character we also get hints of the nonsense yet to come. This absurdity is neatly summed up in her and Bond's first scene together, in which nearly ever sentence is a ornithological related innuendo. The series has always been known for witty rejoinders, and Bond's post state sanctioned one-liners, however Die Another Day is like the Korean minefield that stands in the way of its villain. Jinx takes the crown for worst one liner, when strapped to a table and being interrogated by Zao, she answers the question "Who sent you?" with "Yo mamma...and she to tell you that she is very disappointed in you." Still, Bond and Jinx's brief interaction leads to another first for the series - Bond's first on screen orgasm (not literally, and don't ask me where I learnt this fact, I swear it just cropped up in some film magazine). 

On Jinx, there were plans for a spin-off for Michelle Yeoh's Wai-Lin in Tomorrow Never Dies, which then changed to Jinx. However, the project never got off the ground, with various reasons being cited, depressingly one being that at the time (and still most recently until the likes of Captain Marvel and Wonder Woman), there hadn't been much evidence for the accountants in the movie business to see a female led action film as a box office smash. Could Halle Berry carry an action movie as the lead based on Die Another Day? Likely yes, as with everyone in the film, it can't be said she isn't giving it 100%. Could the character of Jinx carry a series? Potentially, as any arguments that she is a fairly two-dimensional, quipping, secret agent, shagger, can also be laid at Mr Bond's feet. Aside from the series spin-off, what is a shame is that for a great portion of the second half of the film, Jinx simply moves from one villain's trap to another, needing rescuing by Bond. 

Anyway, back to the Cuban clinic, and here we find more evidence that the film is preparing to go haywire shortly. Both Bond and Jinx infiltrate the clinic, unaware that the other has done the same, and each with different motives for being there: Bond is there for Zao, Jinx to shut down the real purpose of the clinic. The creepy doctor leading the project explains to her that they take bone marrow from orphans, and homeless ("people who won't be missed") and use it to reconstruct the patient's appearance to that of their donor. Fairly outlandish, but it did still have an air of Bondian escapism, where the plot is often straining at the edges of believability. Bond interrupts Zao in the middle of a procedure to turn him into a white person (more on this later), and Jinx assassinates the doctor. The clinic burns down, Zao gets away, and Jinx does a very shoddy CGI dive into the waters to escape (more on that later too). 

We've one more key scene before the movie descends into cartoonish excess, but it is a great scene. We are finally introduced to the villain of the piece, Gustav Graves (played with great smarm by Toby Stephens - who I only recently learnt is Dame Maggie "Professor McGonagall" Smith's son). Bond is lead to him when he notes that Zao had diamonds chemically inscribed with Gustav Grave's industrial logo, but they are actually conflict diamonds that Graves must be smuggling. Stephens is wonderfully hammy and old-fashioned in his villainy, and it was nice to have one more "evil industrialist" villain before the Craig era consigned them the scrapheap of history.

But alas! All is not what it seems and instead Graves is actually Colonel Moon who survived his pre-credits death, and has undergone gene-therapy to now appear as a white person. Eugh - there isn't enough time in the world to go through all the reasons that this is problematic, but I will just leave it at this: could you imagine a film in this day and age, where they actively whitewash a character as part of the plot?

Anyway, back to the last great scene of the film: the fencing fight. A classic Bond staple, Bond and villain get involved in some sort of game or sport, betting on the outcome, and it is usually just a way for both men to not so subtlety wink at one another to say "I'm on to you." Well, in Die Another Day they take this to its logical conclusion and have an incensed Graves insist that their fencing match progress to "first blood drawn from the torso." Out of this is a superbly choreographed duel between the pair, as they rampage through the fencing club, switching out various styles of weaponry. The scene is also not just action for action's sake as the ferocity that Graves attacks Bond will get the audience's minds whirring as to why he seems to detest Bond so much (it is a shame that the answer to this question is what it is in the film). 

Also introduced with Graves is his publicist, actually an undercover MI6 agent, no actually a double agent working for Graves, Miranda Frost (played with "icy" [forgive me] calm by Rosmund Pike). The writing is on the wall that Pike is likely villainous, once you note the mantra that Bond cannot have both Frost and Jinx, one must be a wrongun (and only one has a British accent, so you know which one it will be). Unfortunately, the character of Frost melts under scrutiny. We aren't really given any reason as to why she has sided with Graves. Yes, he tells us that he "bought" her loyalty by ensuring her opponent during the Olympic fencing competition overdosed, gifting her the gold by default, but this doesn't explain why she wants to side with a North Korean Colonel who wants all of the West ruled by North Korea with his diamond encrusted sun laser satellite. 

Ah yes, for the second half of the film we are taken to Grave's ice palace in Iceland for the unveiling of his latest project - said diamond encrusted sun laser satellite. His cover story is that it will be used as a "second sun" to double crop production, to end poverty. What he actually wants it for is that it can focus the sun's power into a destructive beam, which he will use to destroy the minefield between North and South Korea and will then conquer it and the world. 

We've gone from gritty torture in North Korea to ice palaces, diamond encrusted sun laser satellite, and gene therapy changing a person's race. Unfortunately, all these plot elements come to the fore in the Iceland bound half of the film, including the use of Bond's invisible car. And you know what, for all the hate it gets, you barely notice it (pun intended). The invisible car doesn't really stand out as odd when we are talking diamond encrusted sun laser satellites. Grave's lightning shooting "power-glove" esque body armour on the other hand does stand out, particularly when he goes full Emperor Palpatine in his final fight with Bond.  Oh and as promised, addressing the god-awful ice-berg surfing scene - the CGI is retina burningly bad, like looking into a diamond encrusted sun laser satellite (I think that's the last time I'll have to say that phrase). 

On one hand, it is a shame that the film was not able to make good on its promises of its opening half, but on the other, re-watching it, I cannot say that I was bored. I've often seen Die Another Day unfavourably compared to Joel Schumacher's Batman & Robin (which, like Die Another Day, saw a the next film in its series as a tonal response to its predecessor's extravagance). I can't see the comparison myself, other than to say that they both share an outlandish quality, its just that Die Another Day managed to put forward a strong first half before letting the crazy cat out of the bag for the second. Batman & Robin is madness from the first minute. 

Die Another Day was Pierce Brosnan's last film appearance as the superspy (but not last canonical appearance as Mr Bond, gifting his voice and likeness for the video-game Everything or Nothing, released in 2003). Overall, I think the animosity towards Die Another Day has painted Brosnan's tenure in a more negative light than deserving. Brosnan was a true all-rounder in the role - he can do the look, the romancing, had a fine comic touch, but could still tap in the darkness and commit himself to the action scenes. Crucially, if Goldeneye wasn't the runaway success that it was, it was highly likely that it would've marked the end of the series, and Brosnan's skill in the role was instrumental to that film's success, and the resurgence of the series.